I find it interesting the juxtaposition that we have grown into as a society. That we are supposed to be strong individuals to fight our own fights and approach our own battles. However at the same time it’s all about who you know and how they can get you where you want to go. It’s this fine balancing act of dependence and independence. Like you need to know someone to get somewhere and once you’re there you’re on your own. But the questions is—do we really need to be on our own?
I have been encountering this concept more often than not within the past year when I moved to a completely different state miles away from my community and knowing no one. I told myself that I needed to work it out, I needed to find my own way, and I needed to stay strong. So naturally I went into survival mode(I know we all do it), depressing the sadness and loneliness, pushing forward to what I thought was the other side. However, when my survival mode started running on empty and my heart started growing weak, I was pleasantly surprised to find that all I had to do was ask. I started finding that more often than not there were people who wanted to support me, to care for me, and to fill my soul. And as the year has progressed, I have come to find two strong truths, I am not created to function on survival mode and I do not have to do life alone.
However, this vicious cycle seems to continue. And while I am now moved back to my hometown, I find myself doing the same thing; fighting to “survive” on my own. And moving towards that empty state when in fact all I need to do is continue to ask. It is a humbling moment where pride is thrown out the window and reality steps.
I do want to take a moment to clarify something though. As women, we are strong individuals capable of much much more than we believe to be. However it does not mean that in order to show our strength we need to fight through life on our own. We have been created as humans to be in community, to depend on one another, and plainly stated … do life together.
So what are you trying to fight alone? And where or how do you need to humble your pride of independence?
I am more than positive that there are five or more people that you could call at this moment who want to be involved in your life. Whether it is a call asking for a shoulder to cry on or a call asking for a cup of sugar to bake with. There are people around you who want and desire to be there for you, all you have to do is ask.
Image via Sincerely Kinsey