True beauty exists beneath skin; the outside is a vessel for inner creativity. I see the whole body in the light of science, nature, and Divine artistry.
As a hairstylist at a hip spot, Novak salon, near downtown Los Angeles, everyday I have clients asking me what they need to do to have their hair grow faster. Patience is the number one thing–I know, as I am going from a pixie cut to mid-back myself, but I have narrowed it down to the top 5 things you can do to help your hair GROW!
5) Protect Your Ends. Never blow dry or use hot tools on your hair without applying a heat protecting serum first. Heat first sucks out moisture, then can burn the hair, causing it to break off. If you apply a serum, your natural moisture stays locked in and only excess serum will burn off. Also use low heat settings on your dryer. It’s better to take an extra ten minutes drying your hair then it take an extra 10 months to achieve your desired length.
4) Cut Down on Shampooing. I would recommend that no one should wash their hair more than 3 times a week. I know this gets tricky for super active girls. This doesn’t mean don’t get it wet; go ahead and rinse well and then condition the ends. The point of not shampooing everyday is so you don’t strip out the natural oils that keep your hair from getting dry and breaking.
3) Brush Your Hair Every Night. Remember Marcia Brady? “100 brushes every night!” This practice goes hand and hand with not washing. Natural oils accumulate at the root of your hair and make you feel the need to shampoo. Using a natural bristle brush, (I suggest a Mason Pierson; spendy, but worth it in the long run) brush from the scalp to the ends, distributing all the oils at the scalp down to your dry ends. This helps make your roots less oily, your ends less dry and less likely to break or split. An added bonus is that this is a very relaxing ritual before bed, especially if you’re lucky enough to have someone do it for you!
2) Treat Your Hair. Once a week give your hair a deep treatment. There are so many different types of hair and hair treatments, but if your goal is to grow, the biggest thing to remember is moisture at the ends! If the ends don’t break, the hair gets longer. Notice that even if your hair is fried, you still need to get your roots touched up? Your hair never stops growing, but if the ends are breaking it will stop getting longer. I like to use a nice oil, such as jojoba, almond, or coconut oil. After shampooing, towel try and apply oil, mid shaft to ends. Twist hair up in a sleek bun or braid if you’re headed to work, or do the treatment before bed and rinse out in the morning. Even left in for just an hour makes a huge difference to your ends.
1) Put Away the Scissors. The number one way to help your hair grow fast is, DON”T CUT IT! So many people think they need to get regular 4-6 week trims even when they are trying to grow their hair long. Trimming is only needed if you have extremely split ends that keep breaking further and further up the hair shaft. My advice is, get a good initial shaping so that the hair falls nicely as it grows. After that, only trim when you see several split ends. Practice the other four tips and you won’t even need to trim because there won’t be any splits!
Winter proves to be long and cold, providing just the excuse we need to let cobwebs collect on our outdoor gear. Yet the arrival of spring tends to draw many of us outdoors again. We finally escape the retreat of our winter nests, rousing to celebrate a new vitality, born of this season, awakening our hibernating spirit of enthusiasm.
Many of us will find ourselves spending increasing amounts of time walking, running, hiking, swimming, or perhaps playing team sports or smartening up our gardens. No matter what our occupation, leisure interests or personal endeavours, every spring stirs an unrestrained longing for open aired ventures.
No more recess–it’s time to drag those runners out of dusty closet, brush them off, and tie them to our feet. But how do we launch our bodies sensibly into action, without the usual limitation of throbbing muscles, or the dreaded possibility of injury?
The remedy: a proper warm up…
Undemanding motion and light dynamic stretching, involving the gentle movement of various parts of our body, will decrease the risk of injury or muscle strain as we launch into outdoor pursuits. A dynamic stretching plan will warm muscles, and in doing so, will prepare our joints for action and facilitate muscular co-ordination.
Other benefits of stretching include improved circulation, enhanced posture, better balance, and of course, increased flexibility.
Let’s review some straightforward tips:
1. Stretch slow and controlled. Dynamic stretching does not include bouncing or jerking. 2. Breathe! Be careful not to hold our breath while stretching. 3. Hold each stretch for 30 – 60 seconds (holding a stretch for a long period of time can cause the muscle to retract). 4. Avoid uncomfortable stretches; stretching should not cause pain. Overstretching can strain the surrounding ligaments and tendons. 5. Do not stretch cold muscles. Stretching is most effective after a brief warm up. Try walking at an easy pace for 10 minutes before stretching. Or stretch after a warm shower or bath.
Beyond the physical payback of stretching, or its benefit in injury prevention, stretching boosts our mind and mood. The increased oxygen supply not only nourishes our muscles, but it stimulates our brain, often leaving us feeling more awake and energized. This also provides us a channel to relieve tensions opposing both mind and body, and occasion to de-stress, de-fuse and reflect.
It is paramount that we stretch our muscles again post-activity, ending workouts or challenging activities with passive or static stretches. These are stretches that allow our body temperature to cool down, and involve holding a position to elongate muscles after they have been tightened and shortened. Doing so effectively minimizes restriction, stiffness or muscle tenderness that often hangs on after an otherwise rewarding work out.
A final pointer for muscular wellbeing: drink ample amounts of water. Hydrated muscles are happy muscles.
We stretch to prime and protect our muscles, tone our body, and most of all to feel alert and vibrant! Now we’re ready to kickoff spring with a twist added to our daily routine, remembering that summer is just around the next bend.
The incredible, edible egg can do much more that nourish your body, it can also be used to tighten and brighten your skin. Inexpensive and easily accessible, an egg can be a wonderful alternative to department store beauty products if you’re on a budget or just looking to try something new. Not to mention it’s entirely natural, so no worries about possible irritants in this one ingredient wonder.
Eggs contains natural vitamin A in the yolk that works to repair scarring and brightens redness while the egg white tightens and shrinks pores. As with all skin care, repeated use will produce more noticeable results, but any little bit helps!
Here’s what you do: Simply, whisk one entire egg until the yolk and white are well blended. Then using your fingers (or if you’re squeamish a cotton pad) apply the egg to your clean face in gentle circular motions. Continue layering the egg until you feel you have enough then allow it to dry and tighten, about 10 minutes or so. Rinse and go on your merry way!
It wasn’t easy, that’s for sure. I thought I had a cute idea when I asked a handful of friends to do a little experiment with me. I invited them over to my house for brunch one chilly, drizzly February morning to participate in a little photo shoot. Warm muffins, bubbly mimosas, creamy espresso, and friends. Magic, right?
There was only one catch–NO make up. It didn’t take long for my cute little idea lose its cuteness. Some said no. Some asked questions, cringing. Some were excited. Some said nothing at all. We ended up with eight women that morning. For some, it was uncomfortable. For some, it seemed easy. The real challenge came when we saw the photos. There was gritting teeth. There was anxiety. I squirmed a little, looking into my own eyes on the computer screen and it began: “Is my face really curved like that?,” “My nose is shaped so weird,” “Why does my right eye always look kind of sloped?,” and “My eyebrows need pencil so bad!”
And I wasn’t alone. There was a unease and awkwardness in seeing them. Us. Just the way we are. Just the way we were created. It’s not something that will change overnight. One little revolutionary brunch can’t cure a disease. Not when we’ve been indoctrinated our entire lives to strive for beauty instead of finding it in the rest of just being who we are. These are the women that husbands wake up to every morning. These women are real.
If I can find a way to grab hold of it, somehow cling to that reality, I can love that girl in the mirror before she has her make up on. What difference does it make? At that point, I can adorn the beauty I have instead of trying to fabricate a beauty clone. My make-up becomes decoration instead of a mask and I have nothing to hide.
Photo Credit: Photos taken by Adrienne Sandvos. A huge thank you to the brave women who allowed me to use their pictures!
We’ve all been there: we sleep through our alarm clock and wake up feeling groggy and frazzled. We look over at our phone to check the time only to see that we’re late! Very late! We rush to the bathroom to quickly get ready for the day, only to see that our hair is absolutely shameful looking.
It’s never a good moment, but inevitably it happens all the time. I can honestly say that I have a bad hair day at least once a week. Between limiting my shampoo sessions to keep my hair’s natural oils distributed and tossing in my sleep, it’s always a surprise when I get up and look in the mirror.
Know what I’m talking about? If you can relate, then you’ll be thankful to know that I have some solutions to share for getting through those bad hair days (and none of them involve a shower, because we all know that the last thing we want to do on a bad hair day is spend an hour fixing the problem).
THE SOCK BUN
Ever seen a girl with a big, perfect-looking bun on top of her head? I’ll bet she had a sock bun. A what? A sock bun. Here’s a quick run-down on how it’s done…
1. Find a clean sock that you don’t need anymore and cut out the toe so the sock is one big tube.
2. Roll the sock inside of itself so it ends up looking like a donut.
3. Pull your hair up into a ponytail at the height you want your bun to be.
4. Pull the end of your ponytail through the center of the sock donut and begin rolling down toward your head, getting the hair. As you roll it down, smooth your hair over the donut, tucking the ends underneath. Your hair will naturally spread out and you can tuck as you go, but you may have to adjust it a bit to make sure the sock is covered.
5. To finish, tuck in any straggler pieces of hair (you may have some if you have layers like me), and voila–you have a glamorous looking bun instead of messy, greasy hair!
DRY SHAMPOO AND SALT SPRAY
If you have even the slightest bit of wave in your hair, this will work miracles for you. To start, you’ll want to use baby powder or your favorite dry shampoo to wipe out the greasiness and also create volume at the roots. Then, spray a sea salt spray (either store bought or homemade) on your ends to create some texture and promote the natural waves. The amount you use will vary based on the texture and thickness of your hair, and on how big and messy you want it to look. My preference? The bigger and messier it is, the better!
HAT IT!
Well, any non-athletic hat will do in this case. I personally love the fedora, but if another style works better for you, then stick with that. If the bottom half of your hair looks good, you can leave your hair down underneath. Otherwise, pull it into a side bun or braid.
Last month Monica Dadivanian wrote The Dirty Word in the Business of Beauty, warning of the dangers posed to us by parabens—potentially “dangerous additive[s] that our previously beloved beauty products contain in order to maintain their longevity, and justify their value.”
Poisonous chemicals in my cosmetics and toiletries? No, I think I’ll pass. I want to follow up on her article by sharing some of my favorite natural beauty products, which I’ve discovered as I, too, have tried to eliminate chemicals from my daily routine.
FOR HAIR L’Occitane Aromachologie Repairing Shampoo and Conditioner. Although definitely on the pricier side (about $20 per bottle), they are a worthy investment. I first discovered this shampoo and conditioner combo on my honeymoon in Whistler, and have been a loyal user ever since. Not only do they have a scent makes you feel like you are at a luxury spa, but they also leave your hair soft and silky.
365 Everyday Value Shampoo and Conditioner. At just $3 per bottle, these are a nice alternative to pricier paraben-free hair products out there. But don’t let the low price point fool you—the formulas are effective and work better than many of the more expensive natural brands I’ve tried.
FOR FACE Burt’s Bees Facial Towelettes with White Tea Extract. If you’re like me and you hate washing your face, you will love these easy breezy facial wipes. They remove all of your makeup, clean, and tone all in one step—and you don’t have to rinse! These are also an excellent option when traveling.
Neutrogena Naturals Purifying Facial Cleanser. Ideal for oily or acne-prone skin, this face wash contains willowbark—an extract rich in Vitamins C, B, and E and a natural source of salicylic acid.
Josie Maran GOGO Instant Natural Volume Argan Mascara in Pitch Black. This product is good for you, and good for others: it contains Argan Oil to nourish lashes and promote healthy growth, and for each one purchased, Josie Maran Cosmetics donates one mascara to a City of Hope cancer patient or survivor. Natural beauty that also pays it forward? Now that’s something I can get on board with!
Kiss My Face Treat Mint Lip Balm. This smooth, minty lip balm nourishes dry lips and prevents future damage with SPF 15 protection. And don’t worry if mint isn’t your thing—this hydrating balm comes in several other flavors including sliced peach, cranberry orange, ginger mango, vanilla honey, strawberry and coconut pineapple.
FOR BODY Tom’s Of Maine Long-Lasting Deodorant. The Tom’s natural formula uses hops (which inhibit the growth of odor-causing bacteria) and zinc salts to fight off and trap underarm odor for up to 24 hours. Though my personal preference is the wild lavender scent, it also comes in apricot, lemongrass and unscented varieties to suit your own personal taste.
Mrs. Meyers Clean Day Basil Liquid Hand Soap. This soap is a must-have for kitchens and bathrooms alike. It contains aloe vera gel, olive oil and natural essential oils that cleanse and soften to keep hands happy and smelling fresh.
Alba Botanica Natural Very Emollient Body Lotion. This is an ideal daily body lotion for any skin type. The light, quick-absorbing moisturizer contains aloe vera, green tea and chamomile extracts to keep skin nourished and healthy.
It’s important to note that I have not been compensated by any of these companies. My recommendations are strictly based on my own personal discoveries and preferences, and I hope they will help you as you start to explore the world of paraben-free products. Let’s remember that with each purchase, we vote with our dollar. The more we invest in natural products, the more of them we’ll see on the shelves in the future.
I remember the first time I saw Mary Shore. She was one of those people that carry a presence with them wherever they go. She had a wonderful rugged, natural beauty about her that I loved; looking at her, you knew something about her life. She had dark textured skin that told of days in the sun, and eyes that were framed by sweet trailing lines–the handiwork of years of smiling. Her hair was long and dark with greying strands (a tribute to her age), and she had a strong yet delicate stature. Her figure said that she was a mom, but her physique spoke of an adventurous, active spirit. I didn’t meet Mary until only a couple of years before her precious life was lost in a car accident. But these are things I will never forget about her. She taught me something about beauty.
The truth is that our bodies often tell a story, but there are some truths we don’t want to actually see. It goes without saying that any physical sign of aging is generally rejected in the media world, thus setting a standard of beauty that is inseparable from the appearance of youth. Attributes that may have once testified to life experience and wisdom are now worn like a scarlet letter. Wrinkles need wrinkle cream. Greying hair needs hair dye.
What is most interesting to me is how directly related many self “improvements” are to being pre-maternal. Post-baby breasts tell the story of the little ones you nursed in the dark hours of the night, and the stretch marks on your abdomen tell the tale of the nine months you carried that child inside of you. Yet when we see these things, we see something different: Imperfection that needs to be remedied. Deflated looking breasts need to be fuller and perkier. Sagging or scarred stomach skin needs to be tightened up. Flat rumps need a lift. No body part is exempt. We are willing to go to great lengths to maintain and manipulate our bodies in their natural form so that we can edit the insinuations our bodies make.
There is a natural cause and effect system in life that exists for everyone. When we go through a major life change, many times we wear it. In the same way, when we abuse our bodies, there can be visible consequences. Somewhere along the line we decided we wanted to try and rewrite that story, and we found a way to do it. We want to control the content of the message that others read when they look at us, along with our skewed interpretation we’ve developed when we look into the mirror.
I was recently talking with a friend about her future plans for her own cosmetic surgery to restore her once firm and slender tummy to its former glory. When I suggested that it might be motivated by her desire for others to see her as beautiful, she answered, “It’s not because I care what other people think. It’s because I think it’s ugly. I think it’s gross. I’m doing it for myself.” I could see that she was sincere and it made me begin to understand that it’s not as simple as insecurity and self-comparison. The more complex issue at hand is the conditional love we’ve placed upon ourselves. We can’t really love ourselves or embrace the stories our bodies tell unless they are telling the version of the truth that we are comfortable with. We have solidly converted to an unnatural and alien view of what beauty is. We want to create a fantasy-land of beauty where anyone can be anything. There is one major problem with that: It’s not reality! We are willing to put our bodies through the trauma of anesthesia, surgical lacerations, laser burns, narcotics, and painful recovery time so that we can comply.
As women, we have to love truth more than we love control if we are ever going to be able to love ourselves and others unconditionally. We have to learn to be OK with what is instead of feeding the silent beast of self-hatred by trying to force what is not. If we don’t, the original story gets lost in the pile of revisions.
I don’t want to cast a blanket of judgment upon women who have had cosmetic surgery or use a beauty regimen. No doubt there are a myriad of reasons and motivations behind a woman’s decision to alter her body as well as infinite “grey areas” within its grandiose scope. Instead, I just honestly want to encourage us as women to seriously think about our opinions on these issues, as we should with any belief or conviction we hold. My hope is that our view on our own beautification is a thoughtful one. And more importantly, that we can fully accept ourselves not only for who we really are, but also for what story our physical appearance may tell those who look upon us. When we put the pen down and stop trying to rewrite the story, we may discover and enjoy a different kind of beauty altogether.
*Photo Credits: Mary Shore pictured as a young mother. Contributed by her son, Seth Shore.
When I was in high school, I carried myself with too much confidence. While I didn’t see it that way at the time, I now know that my confidence was rooted in pride, rather than a strong grasp of my own value and worth.
Years later when I was in college, my confidence plummeted to the ground as I battled with my body image for the first time ever (how I skipped that phase of adolescence, I have no idea). Not only did I have a negative view of my appearance, but I also had low self-esteem rooted in the self-imposed pressure to succeed at everything I set out to do. I was a mess, to say the least. The pendulum swung from one extreme to another, and I couldn’t seem to find the balance.
Some say that “confidence is the best accessory,” and while I agree to an extent, I’d argue that the statement is only true when our confidence is based on the right thing. Confidence and pride do not go together, but rather true confidence stands firmly on our understanding of who we are.
As a girl with an affinity for statement necklaces, I appreciate having the best accessories. And when it comes to confidence, I want the real deal. The kind that sparkles and shimmers and that people can’t help but notice. The beautiful kind, that is neither connected to my insecurities nor my pride. The kind that generates itself based on living an outward-focused life.
Want to be beautiful? Want to have real, deep and true confidence? It’s time for us to grasp our God-given identity and believe that nothing (and nobody) can take that away from us. Real confidence is rooted in our faith. Not only by believing in God, but by believing God when he tells us who we are and what we’re made for.
You are loved, you are cherished, you are valued, you are made for a purpose, you are worth more than you know. Have confidence in that.
Back in August 2009, I received an email from my now-husband saying, “Now…this is random, but just go with it and I’ll give you more details later.” He followed the sentence with an excerpt from the book of Mark in the Bible:
“Jesus sat down opposite the place where the offerings were put and watched the crowd putting their money into the temple treasury. Many rich people threw in large amounts. But a poor widow came and put in two very small copper coins, worth only a fraction of a penny. Calling his disciples to him, Jesus said, “I tell you the truth, this poor widow has put more into the treasury than all the others. They all gave out of their wealth; but she, out of her poverty, put in everything—all she had to live on.” (Mark 12:41-44)
After I read it, I went back and read it about fifteen more times. I was meeting him for lunch that day, and since he didn’t tell me why he’d sent the excerpt for me to read, I assumed it was something he wanted to discuss with me further. However, much to my surprise, as soon as I got to San Diego he handed me a pretty little purple box with the most beautiful necklace inside: a 2,000-year-old copper coin pendant, set in gold and hanging on a delicate gold chain–the very same kind of coin the widow would have had when she made her small offering.
I love this necklace because every time I put it on I am reminded to give all that I can, no matter how small.
Regardless of our financial status, we all have the opportunity live in a sacrificial way. Giving all we have to live on looks different for everyone. But I can’t help but ask myself, “When was the last time I gave in a way that truly stretched me?”
How we choose to be generous depends on what the circumstances are and what we have to offer. Whether it be money or time, we need to stretch ourselves in generosity toward those around us. It’s not a natural choice, and it’s not an easy choice, but it’s a daily choice we all have the opportunity to make as we pursue generous lives–outpouring all that we have to give for the benefit of those in need.
Parabens have become a new dirty word in the business of beauty. We have all seen the cautionary articles warning us about the “P” word as a dangerous additive that our previously beloved beauty products contain in order to maintain their longevity, and justify their value.
The primary scare is that parabens used in popular over the counter cosmetic products, (ranging from those carried in the most elite boutiques to the drug stores and supermarkets), have been said to contribute to breast cancer. This is a topic of a hot debate on both the market and manufacturing end, as well as at the tables of ladies at lunch.
Studies have shown that parabens can cause endocrine disruption, which may lead to the perception of increased levels of estrogen, which have been indicated in patients with breast cancer. However, studies show that these disruptions occur due to parabens mimicking estrogenic activity, as opposed to actually increasing the amount of estrogen. It is important to note that increase in these cells is not the same as cell mutation, which can lead to developing cancer cells. In addition, varying levels of hormones in people, including estrogen, is mostly based on genetic makeup, and that increased levels of any hormone result in various aesthetic diversities that are not necessarily dangerous to one’s health.
However, even if a product is made up of organic materials, it may still need some forms of parabens to extend its shelf life. Part of the preservation process of a product calls for dehydration. The presence of water-based moisture in a product creates an environment for oxidation, which can easily serve as a breeding ground for fungi and bacteria. Although the FDA has determined that parabens are safe in cosmetic products, the Cosmetic Ingredient Review, (an industry-sponsored organization which reviews cosmetic ingredient safety) noted that parabens are safe as long as they don’t make up more than 25% of the product’s content. Most products, however, only have parabens in levels ranging from 0.01% to 0.3%.
Some products end uses call for them to be more water based in order to fulfill their role as a beauty tool, therefore some mild preservatives (albeit in minimal quantities) are added to the product, such as grapefruit seed extract, or blueberry extract. These can be used as derivatives for mild forms of parabens, and allow the products to remain perfectly suitable for meeting a plethora of skin and hair care needs, all the while maintaining their natural origin.
Fortunately, due to the free market economy, and as smart, independent consumers, we have many options! If we decide that no chance is too small to take when it comes to the absorption of potentially harmful chemicals through our biggest organ (our skin) there are plenty of natural and organic beauty products available to us. Darling will be reviewing many healthy skin products in the near future, so stay tuned!
I remember the first time I saw Mary Shore. She was one of those people that carry a presence with them wherever they go. She had a wonderful rugged, natural beauty about her that I loved; looking at her, you knew something about her life. She had dark textured skin that told of days in the sun, and eyes that were framed by sweet trailing lines–the handiwork of years of smiling. Her hair was long and dark with greying strands (a tribute to her age), and she had a strong yet delicate stature. Her figure said that she was a mom, but her physique spoke of an adventurous, active spirit. I didn’t meet Mary until only a couple of years before her precious life was lost in a car accident. But these are things I will never forget about her. She taught me something about beauty.
Parabens have become a new dirty word in the business of beauty. We have all seen the cautionary articles warning us about the “P” word as a dangerous additive that our previously beloved beauty products contain in order to maintain their longevity, and justify their value.