You Are Not Forgotten

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You Are Not Forgotten | Darling Magazine

Mother’s Day is one of the most empowering holidays on the calendar. It celebrates the beautiful gift we women possess, to bring children into the world, and notes the lavish amount of time that we spend raising them. The road to becoming a mother may not always be easy, but it is wholly unique to womanhood and one of the most endearing life experiences we can have.

On this Mother’s Day, we want to take a moment to remember the “forgotten” mothers. The women who were never able to hold their babies, and those to long to hold their children again.

Many can overlook the despair of miscarriage and child loss on a day of celebration, because only those who have been affected by its loss can truly understand the grief that is felt each and every day following. If you know someone facing sorrow today, whether a recent loss or one from long ago, you probably know that no words can heal the brokenness. It is a delicate topic, and should be approached with few words, but no mother wants her child to go unremembered. Giving a gift of flowers and a “thinking of you today” note can be a beautiful way to show that you remember not only the mother, but also the child.

For those of us who have faced loss in our own lives, creating a routine for Mother’s Day is profound way to remember a child. A remembrance can be as simple as lighting a candle, looking through photos, planting a tree, or visiting a grave with family. The significant part is that you are creating a goal for this day–to remember and celebrate the precious child who made you a mother.

Happy Mother’s Day to all the mothers reading, especially to those who are missing a loved one. You are not forgotten.

Image via Pinterest

Ashley Wingo lives in Southern California with her charming husband + their four littles. She chats about motherhood, family and running her business at www.houseoflovelock.com
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Darling On NBC: Last Minute Mother’s Day Gift Ideas

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Mother’s Day is tomorrow, and while we hope every single one of you has already purchased and/or sent a gift to your lovely mother, we know that some of you might be in need of a last-minute gift idea!

Click below to watch NBC’s Michelle Valles interview Sarah Dubbeldam about Mother’s Day gift ideas on Today in LA…

This post is brought to you by the Darling Team! To learn more about who we are, please visit our Meet Our Team page.
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In My Toolbox: Must-Haves For The DIY Girl

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In My Toolbox: Must-Haves For The DIY Girl

With warm weather and longer days finally here, visions of projects dance in our heads. The itch to get deep into DIY abounds—“But wait!,” you say, “ I don’t have all those fancy tools! I wouldn’t even know where to start.” Three words. You are mistaken. To complete the most simple to moderately involved DIY projects you only need a few basic tools. Having the right tool for any job keeps the task from becoming frustrating, taking more time than it should, and possibly ending up with something ruined. Think of an artist, a gardener, a cook—their craft requires the right tools, and the most basic if that, to be enjoyable and successful. In this series, we’ll explore those basic tools that any DIY girl would need—novice or expert—so that you can have a most successful handmade, make it from scratch, paint-the-town type of season.

Hammer
It is essential that every DIY gal has one of these (emphasis on essential). The most well-rounded choice would be a 12” curved claw nail hammer. One of these in your toolbox, and you are good to go! For the more rustic, you can choose a hammer with a wooden handle. For the more modern, you may opt for a metal handled hammer.

Pliers
When asking a turned city dweller: “Why didn’t you stay on the farm and be a farmer?” Their response makes case and point: “Every good farmer can fix anything with bailing wire and a pliers. I couldn’t.” That statement couldn’t be more true. For a lot of woodworking projects pliers won’t be used much, but having a standard and needle-nose pliers will get you places in life. The Craftsman set of both types from Sears, for example, are a great option.

Adjustable Wrench
Yet, another very handy tool. Get a 10” and never look back. This choice fits nearly any size nut or bolt with its adjustable spinning parts. And darling, you won’t regret it when you’ve mastered fixing your leaky sink sans plumber thanks to your handy wrench.

Screwdrivers
There are an abundance of types and sizes of screwdrivers, Phillips and Flathead being the most common. A good alternative to getting a full set of different screwdrivers is going with a ratcheting style screwdriver along with a set of interchangeable bits. A set like this can be found at any hardware store, like Harbor Freight. Along with a standard set, you may also need to get a set of very small screwdrivers separately for smaller screws.

Hex Keys
These are not as common and many times come with “build-it-yourself” furniture, eh-em Ikea. However, have you bought something preassembled or already built off Craigslist or thrifted and now it is loose and falling over? Tighten it up with the marvelous hex key. Many bit sets come with these included with them. If you purchase a bit set with a ratcheting style screwdriver, check to make sure it includes hex keys.

Lauren lives in Denver, CO where she can often be found navigating a tool box with her handy husband and delving into home design. She blogs at pearlspoppiespinkiesup.blogspot.com, and loves swimming, her spunky dog, scouring thrift stores, and frozen yogurt.
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Twinkle Toes: DIY Pedicure At Home

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Twinkle Toes: DIY Pedicure At Home | Darling Magazine

Pampering your feet is one way to get those toes looking and feeling summer-ready. Since professional pedicures take time (and sometimes big bucks that we don’t always have), why not accomplish the same results with an at-home pedicure? Here’s how…

Soak
Begin by removing old polish. In a wash basin of warm water, soak feet for about 10 minutes to clean and soften the skin and toenails–and to relax your tired toes! Use an orange stick to remove dirt from under nails.

Hint: add Epsom salts to your foot bath, a splash of scented oil, or try our homemade foot soak (recipe below).

Exfoliate
Remove one foot at a time from the basin to exfoliate each foot, gently scrubbing away dry skin with a homemade salt scrub (try our suggested recipe below). Buff any calluses with pumice or callus stone. Afterwards, rinse both feet with clean (non-soapy) water.

Moisturize
Pat feet dry and massage cuticle oil (gently pushing back cuticles with an orange stick if needed). In an upward motion, slather a rich foot cream onto feet and legs or massage skin using your favorite natural oil. Our favorites are coconut oil, grapeseed oil or sweet almond oil.

Clip
Clip your nails and lightly file each. Remember to clip and file straight across—rounded shapes can lead to ingrown toenails.

Finish
Apply polish. A base coat will prevent nails from yellowing, and a top coat will offer strength and protect your polish. Let polish dry for at least two minutes between coats. And when all is done, be patient—put your feet up for 20 minutes to properly dry.

Now, for the recipes…

Sea Salt Foot Bath
1/2 cup fine sea salt or Epsom salt
Basin of hot water

Boil water and add salt to dissolve. Once the water temperature is cooled down (warm to the finger) pour into foot basin and soak feet.

Note: Adding essential scented oils, such as lavender oil or eucalyptus essential oil will make this foot bath all the more soothing and pampering!

Sea Salt Foot Scrub
1 cup fine sea salt
1 cup sweet almond oil (or try coconut oil or olive oil as alternatives)
(optional) a few drops peppermint essential oil

Mix all ingredients together and use on skin as an exfoliating rub. (Store extra scrub mix in a sealed glass jar).

Note: Sea salt serves both to clean and heal our feet; it contains antibacterial and healing properties. A salt bath and scrub can additionally reduce inflammation and increase circulation.

Now it’s time for you to treat your feet. And girls, don’t forget the most important part: put your best foot forward!

Kelly is from Victoria, BC, Canada and shares an enthusiasm for writing and has a passion for outdoor pursuits including rock climbing and mountaineering. Follow @hellokellyink as Kelly explores new adventures while currently residing in South Africa.
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Significant With or Without a Significant Other

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Significant With or Without a Significant Other | Darling Magazine

“You is kind. You is smart. And you is important.” These are the precious words Aibileen shared with young Mae Mobley in the movie, The Help. While the words are simple, the message is deep…it’s about communicating the truth about her value and significance regardless of her circumstances. Most of us have no objection seeing a young girl as unconditionally valuable, yet we often hold ourselves to a different standard. What about the “little girl” inside each of us that longs to know that we are significant regardless of our circumstances?

I distinctly remember reading a post from author Shauna Niequist on Valentine’s Day where she ended her thoughts by saying, “Remember that you are significant with or without a significant other.” All too often, we as young women judge our worth based on whether or not we have a significant other as if being in a relationship increases our value or earns us a stamp of approval. So how do we take our value out of the hands of the other? How can we be in relationship and claim the truth about our value regardless of the outcome of that relationship?

Go To The Root
We all have insecurities and recurring pain. However the kind of pain we feel in the midst of difficult circumstances is unique to each of us based on the painful times in our own stories. How did you learn that you needed a guy to love you in order to be lovable? Perhaps you experienced a relationship that caused you to question whether or not you were loved or perhaps you endured a tragedy that left you questioning your own empowerment in the world. Whatever events your story holds, one of the bests gifts we can give ourselves now is to revisit those moments and speak truth to the little girl that began to question her value and safety. Going back to the root of our pain is the best way to move forward on a new path where we can truly own our worth. It is difficult to claim our value now while still doubting our value in the past.’’

Be You
When we question our value, we begin to question the person that we are—our strengths, our weaknesses, our personality. When we start to question the person that we are, we will likely alter ourselves in ways that are not true to ourselves. We become the person that we perceive others’ want us to be. Here, we must realize the message that we send ourselves in the process of trying to become someone else. By rejecting who we are to please others we are saying, “I am not good enough as is and I am not wanted or lovable as I am now.” Instead, of altering yourself out of your insecurities, start by articulating the message you want to give yourself and decide how you want to act based on this truth. If you knew unequivocally that you were valuable, how would you interact in your relationship with yourself and others? How would your priorities be different? Chances are a life based on the truth about your worth looks different than your current life.

Live Your Truth
Our actions should speak louder than words. Whether we are in a relationship or not, the way that we conduct ourselves should speak to the knowledge of our unconditional value. While we should not become invulnerable, never depending on anyone for support, the choices we make in our relationships should reflect a strong relationship with ourselves. Making choices based on the knowledge that we are worthy and valued will not only lead to healthier relationships, but we will also attract the right person who loves us for who we truly are and not someone who loves us for our performance as someone we are not. Isn’t this what we had hoped to find in the first place?

As women, we dream, we plan, we hope…we have an idea of what we hope our life looks like. It is healthy to dream and it is healthy to hope. However when a deviation from our plans, hopes and dreams means that we turn on ourselves and question how lovable we are, we MUST revisit our worth through the lens of the truth about who we are regardless of our circumstances. So, in the words of Shauna Niequist, “Remember you are significant with or without a significant other.”

Image via Wit & Delight

Nicole is a writer, speaker, marriage and family therapist and recent east coast transplant where she lives with her husband jimmy in Westport, CT. She loves to hear the hearts of others as a wife, daughter, sister, friend, and therapist and enjoys pouring her heart out on paper with honest talk about what it means to live fully and wholly.
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How To Dress For Graduation

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How To Dress For Graduation | Darling Magazine

Congratulations, you did it! We understand that graduating from college not only means you’ve completed a massive goal, but it also means you’ve succeeded in eating cafeteria food, hardly sleeping because of your loud roommate and pulling all-nighters for exams. Getting to put on that well deserved cap and gown is more than an amazing feeling, but before you walk through the cheering crowd with your fellow classmates, finding the right outfit to wear beneath the robe can be challenging. To look and feel your best, consider the following tips…

Tip 1: Check The Weather
There’s nothing more uncomfortable than dressing like it’s 80 degrees when it’s actually only 65. With all the smart phones, reading the weather report has become easier than reading the alphabet.

Tip 2: Be Photo-Conscious
Remember that on this day, your every move will be documented. From morning to late evening, gown or no gown, hundreds of photos will be taken and shared via social media. These pictures may be framed for years to come, so ensure you choose something that not only represents you, but that you feel comfortable in. Also, refrain from choosing anything with extra volume, as wearing the gown on top will only make you appear (more) shapeless.

Tip 3: Choose Versatility
You most likely won’t have time to change in between events, so keep in mind you’ll want your look to be casual, but fun for both day and night. Simple little trick: the easiest way to change your look? Swap the shoes.

Tip 4: Skip The Stilettos
Speaking of shoes, avoid wearing stiletto heels. Not only will you be worried of tripping on stage when they call your name, but you’ll also be sinking into the grass with every step. Instead, try a shoe with a chunky heel, or best, a wedge.

Tip 5: Stay Hands Free
The only thing you’ll want to be holding is your diploma, so leave your extra large purse at home. A small cross-body bag that holds only your cell phone, camera (usually the cell phone is the camera) and wallet should be all you need. If you can find a cute dress with pockets, or feel daring with a fashionable fanny pack, we salute you!

Now that you’ve got a degree and killer look, go out and celebrate! There’s no other time than now to relish in achievement, freedom and pure excitement. After all, you’ve earned it!

Image via Pinterest

Cathleen is a writer, stylist and works for one of the leading fast fashion companies in the world. Based in Los Angeles, she and her husband enjoy quality time with friends, traveling and random dance parties. Find more of her work at cathleensimmons.com.
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Paris

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Paris | Darling Magazine

“If you are lucky enough to have lived in Paris as a young man, then wherever you go for the rest of your life it stays with you, for Paris is a moveable feast.” -Ernest Hemingway

Paris is the kind of city that fills every visitor with the burning desire to be an artist, a temporary madness for some, a life changing discovery and unspeakable gift for others. Once you fall in love with Paris, you stop caring that you are in love with a cliché, that you are just another insignificant, breathless fan there to soak up the city of Hugo, Proust, and Hemingway. Being a foreigner in Paris is often like having a conversation with an elegant, polished and interesting person who is dressed for a party when you have just woken up and are still in your pajamas; it will leave you feeling scruffy and inadequate, and completely enchanted.

One of the fascinating things about the City of Light is how it has retained its aesthetic purity and architectural coherence to such an extent over the years. The answer is relatively simple – a lot of Paris was rebuilt by Baron Haussman in the Nineteenth Century, accounting for the trademark Paris buildings with their movie-set beauty and uniformity in which every cornice, balcony and sloping roof is pleasing to the eye. Unlike London (or other major European cities) Paris was occupied during the Second World War, meaning that much of its centre was preserved from bombing.

Everybody knows that there is a fantastic view from the Eiffel Tower, that the Louvre and the Musée d’Orsay are stuffed full of wonderful art, and that it is a lot of fun to relive scenes from Amélie on the steps of the Sacré-Cœur. If you ever find yourself in this most beautiful city in search of some slightly less well-known gems, here is a little dose of inspiration to help you on your way. All of these treasures are within walking distance of each other, and are the ingredients for a perfect day in Paris.

Paris | Darling Magazine

Musée National du Moyen Age (metro: Cluny La Sorbonne/Saint Michel)
Opening hours: 9am – 5:45pm every day, except for Tuesdays
Price: €8 (€6 concession, free for European passport holders aged 25 and under)
This national museum of the Middle Ages will give you a glimpse of the lost medieval Paris. It is worth visiting for the famous Lady and the Unicorn tapestries alone; kept in a darkened room to protect the naturally dyed silk and wool, these six late Fifteenth Century tapestries depict the five senses. There is an air of fairytale mystery to these richly embroidered beauties that won’t fail to capture any Romantic’s imagination.

When you leave the museum you will find yourself close to the Jardin du Luxembourg, which is a lovely place to take a baguette and have lunch while watching children float little sail boats on the pond and pigeons bobbing and flaring their tails over a scrap of bread in the shade of the neatly clipped trees.

Place des Vosges, Le Marais (metro: Saint Paul)
This magnificent square is one of the finest examples of Parisian architecture (it is said to have been the model for all subsequent European residential squares), with it’s rose colored brick and fantastical curled lamp posts, and is a wonderful place to take a stroll.

Have a citron-pressé or a crème brûlée in Café Hugo, tucked away in one of the far corners of the square where you can sit and people watch under the beautiful arches. It gets very crowded in the evenings, but is an incredibly atmospheric (and relatively tourist free) place to sample a classic steak and frites with a glass of house red. They have regular live music events in the evenings.

If you would like a break from browsing in the little boutiques and galleries that this area of Paris is famous for, Carette Vosges (also tucked away in the arcade in the main square) is an elegant Salon de Thé with enough pretty pastries and mounds of colorful macarons to keep your inner Marie-Antoinette blissfully happy.

In a neighboring smaller square nearby, Place du Marché Sainte Catherine, the restaurant Bistrot de la Place offers a quiet, pretty, and reasonably priced place to have dinner (two courses from the set menu for €18.50).

Paris | Darling Magazine

Shakespeare & Company (metro: Saint Michel)
Opening hours: 10am – 11pm, Monday – Friday, 11am – 11pm, Saturday and Sunday
Instantly recognizable from the opening scene of the romantic drama, Before Sunset, this quirky English language bookshop is a favorite spot for expatriates, disheveled philosophers, and aspiring writers. Opened by Sylvia Beach in 1919, an American from New Jersey, it featured in Hemingway’s A Moveable Feast as a home from home for many modern American authors in the twenties. On its new premises right across from Notre-Dame cathedral, Shakespeare & Company continues its tradition of fostering up and coming talent with regular poetry readings, literary festivals, and the Paris Literary Prize.

Books lining the walls from floor to ceiling, stacked precariously, make this place a literary lover’s paradise. There is an air of possibility and romance to the little typewriter, ready to be tapped away on as soon as inspiration hits. The low murmur of voices mingles with the occasional sound of a piano, and visitors leave scrawled notes, photographs, and metro tickets on a big mirror upstairs, a crowded communal collage that stands testament to so many different adventures, hopes, and dreams.

Travelers flock to this little corner of Paris hungry for a glimpse of the city that they have read and dreamed about, the city of little winding staircases, peeling paint, and type writers in attics overlooking the Seine. A fantasy, perhaps, projected onto the city by eager expatriates, but a fantasy that can be fulfilled in this bookshop. It is eccentric, it is rather self aware, and it is definitely more American than French. But it is no less interesting or charming for all of that, and you are bound to have a memorable encounter or two if you spend long enough browsing through the modernist classics.

Sainte Chapelle (metro: Cité/Saint Michel)
Opening hours: open every day (apart from public holidays) from the 1 March – 31 October, 9:30am – 6pm, and 1 November – 28 February, 9am – 5pm. It is also open until 9pm during the summer months (15 May – 15 September).
Price: €8.50 (€5.50 concession, free for European passport holders aged 25 and under)
Built between 1239 and 1248 by King Louis IX of France to house some of the most important relics of medieval Christendom, including Christ’s Crown of Thorns, this is the most beautiful religious building in Paris – perhaps even in Europe. The starry ceiling seems to float on rich jewel colored stained glass windows that completely enshrine the nave on all sides. Each window depicts a story from the Old Testament like a giant medieval cartoon strip, a miracle of craftsmanship and storytelling. Catch Sainte Chapelle on a sunny day as the light streams through the windows, and your breath will catch in your throat as your heart feels like it is expanding.

Paris | Darling Magazine

Bring some letters or a diary to write, take a seat, and linger a while to soak up this otherworldly place. Later in life, when you are stressed and tired back in the rush and the grey concrete, you will have it stored up, a reserve of beauty to draw on and give you strength. Treasure this moment, darling, so that “wherever you go for the rest of your life it stays with you.”

Read more about our love affair with Paris in “We’ll Always Have Paris” by Kelli Ryan in our Spring Issue. Get yours here >>

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What You See Is What You Get

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What You See Is What You Get | Darling Magazine

The highway was clear and breezy with my hair whipping back from my face. The radio kept me company on a windy, spring drive. I stopped at a gas station for my favorite sparkling water and was greeted by an amiable cop with a sweet southern twang. I made easy conversation with the man behind the counter who took a friendly interest in my weekend plans—genuinely wishing me a very happy Friday as I left his small store.

I got back into the car shaking my head, amazed at the kindness of strangers—overwhelmed with goosebumps and a tugging at my tear ducts. It felt like nice things were strewn across my path that day, waiting to be delightfully discovered. And I was thankful. People were kind, flowers were extra sweet, and the birds’ chirping was melodically soothing. I sighed­—big and happy. The world felt like a puzzle, fitting together with ease and beauty.

On days like that my mind becomes an old, red Viewmaster, displaying my happy memories before my eyes. Click, click, click, the memories flip like the round disk of slides. I am overwhelmed and teary at the beautiful life I’m living.

On another, equally unassuming day, my alarm failed to go off. I woke up with 10 minutes to spare before I’d be late for work—again. With mascara half on and my foot blindly searching for a shoe, I hurried towards the door. Only when I was pulling away from my house did I realize that I was absolutely starving and impossibly sleepy.

Coffee is a non-negotiable on a day like that.

I sped toward the drive through only to find out that 10 other cars had the same idea. Too late to back out, I waited in line for what seemed like forever, watching the clock tick away until I was undoubtedly late for work.

The day got worse from there. Nothing seemed to go right and everything I did seemed wrong. I was sensitive and insecure, anxious and frantic. Sliding quickly towards the end of my rope, tears threatened to break through the thin veil that was barely holding them at bay.

I stepped outside for a moment to take a breath and look around. I remembered with amazement that just a few days before, the world had been a bright and shining place. What had happened to the smell of those flowers, and where were those darn birds? I couldn’t see beauty through my thick, angry fog.

It seems that on a good day, all I can see is beauty. It’s like my eyes are trained to only see bright colors and love—the rest of the world fading away into the background.

But on a bad day it’s the opposite. I am blind to joy and beauty and attuned to all of the bad things that hide down alleys and in the safety of the dark.

I wonder if it’s the day—if there’s a pattern or a rhyme or a reason. Is it a certain cereal or clocking the full eight hours? Is it your dreams or your stress level or is the coffee shop just always extra crowded on the days you’re in the biggest hurry? What’s the tipping point between the best days and the kinds where you want to give up and start again?

I think that the key is in our eyes.

On days when we feel good, when we’re tall and clean and rested, our eyes seem to be tuned differently. Maybe our eyes follow our mood, capturing the beautiful things around us that reflect the beauty stirring inside. Beauty sees beauty.

And the opposite seems true as well. We’re hurried and anxious and dissatisfied already, and our tuned-in eyes capture all of the things that reinforce that negativity. Frustration sees frustration.
What we see is what we get.

So what if we ask our eyes to go first? What if, even before our moods decide to cooperate, we ask our eyes to look for those beautiful things – not out of a good mood, but in an effort to create one? What if we decide, on purpose, to look for the beautiful things in the world – pulling our stubborn moods along until they’re ready to walk on their own?

I want to go through every day—regardless of which side of the bed I woke up on—and notice the sweet scent of the flowers, and the tickle of the wind ruffling my hair across my shoulder. I want to see the beauty that is strewn across my path each day—just waiting to be discovered.

What could we cultivate if we decided to look for beauty?

Photo by Gabriella Rose Photography

Stephanie May is a world-traveling journalist who is in love with coffee, with life and with all things beautiful. When she’s not traveling (and especially when she is), she’s writing for The Lipstick Gospel and tweeting at @Smay15.
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